Monday, July 7, 2008

The Young and the Restless

The title suggests one single person having youthfulness and restless energy. It can also describe two separate individuals - one who is young in age with little experience in life, and another who is restless and seeking to experience more of life.

In the course of more than a decade of professional work in the marketplace and having stuck through the good and bad times, my younger friends check in with me from time to time, seeking for some perspectives on their thoughts and struggles regarding their challenging situations.

Just the other day, I came across this quote and it made me think about the various conversations I have had with my friends ...



The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience,
while the error of age is to believe that experience is a substitute for intelligence.

Many of these young professionals are incredibly bright and exhibit great thinking abilities. Many of them are also restless and gripe about why they are not moving up the ranks fast enough. Many seem to have the right skills and deliver well at their level but somehow don't seem to be moving up as fast as they had envisioned.

I don't have all the answers really, but in my years of work with multinational companies - both with foreign and local management, small to larger groups of employees, I have come to realize a few things ...

Sometimes, it's not about what you can or cannot do (the hard skills) rather it's about the values, attitude and behavior (the soft skills). The latter is very difficult to learn - it all depends on whether you have a teachable heart, and it becomes more difficult for the proud or older ones who think they have seen it all and done it all to learn/possess. It's not something you pick up from a textbook. Some might say, it can't be taught, it can only be caught (when you spend enough time with that parent, teacher, or mentor.)

In other instances, it may be who you know. Being at the right place at the right time and with the right people is important. It's about being discovered by the people who need your skills and are able to appreciate the value you can bring to the table.

The downside of completely relying on who you know and not allowing yourself time to acquire knowledge and build the right skills is that you may not be selected based on merit. This can cause many side effects such as being promoted to one's incompetence, losing the respect of your colleagues and associates, not being taken seriously for your work, or possibly be the subject of bad gossip.

Yet other times, it may be that there just isn't a business reason for the promotion. And of course, what we all would not want to hear is "you are just not ready for the next level." Sometimes, that can be true; while other times, you will wonder ... do keep wondering and perhaps, it really may mean that it's time to move on, especially if you do not feel you can grow within the same scope of work and in the same company.

What I do know is that each individual is called to different things and grows at different paces/times. Some people have growth spurts while others take time to blossom. Some may get it right the first time (luck maybe) but others may be called to take the path less travelled - to master the basics (mind you, this will take many, many years of life!) so they can think outside the box and be great innovators.

To master the rules, one has to "stick it out" for as long as it takes. Such would be the times to grow in character and maturity. Think of it this way, a very tall building ought to have an equally deep foundation; otherwise it would not stand. Without the depth of character that comes from persevering through time, one would at worse be a miserable creepy crawler (I am sure this has another name but I can't recall at this time!) - shooting up fast by relying on support from more sturdy branches or structures for that short period of time. Without others, they would never stand because they have not stood the test of time and allowed deep roots and strong foundations to be built into their lives.

Therefore, determine this day what kind of professional you will be ... one who aspires to become a very tall building (with deep foundations) that will withstand the test of time or the creepy crawler ... likened to buildings made of sand (a dime a dozen perhaps) that would dissipate and blow away into oblivion with the winds of change?

Having thought through this time and time again, a few questions have helped me work things out within myself and come to terms with current situations:

1. Am I growing in knowledge, skills, and character (and faith) through this experience

2. Am I at the place where I need to be for the grander scheme of things (this is usually my question to God - am I where I need to be and mutually benefiting from relationships in your grand plans?)

3. And finally, if I am still restless about the current situation and cannot find an acceptable resolution, then it really may be a good idea to explore other options that would seek to meet those needs (preferably, in a prayerful manner for those who are in faith).

Whatever those options may present themselves to be, consider that while they may look good in the short run, they can possibly set you back a few years in the long run ... so choose wisely.

In parting, here's a nice quote:


Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered,
you will never grow
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

What I take this to mean is don't be jaded with the current situation. Determine to get out of your boredom. Challenge yourself to see a different perspective. Seek to create a different approach to the current work or situation. And make the best of your situation ... or at least as long as you are there.

And if all else fails, yes, we hope that the One up there also agrees with us that it's absolutely time to move on to another area of expertise or another work environment all together.

As this is not a post about me having all the answers (as I certainly don't), I welcome feedback on other thoughts and advice that may help me (and perhaps others) think through the situations, as opposed to reacting to the instability of emotions or dire needs waiting to be met!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your title and musings reminds me of young Joseph in the book of Genesis, he of the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat fame. God revealed to Joseph that he was destined for great things, who being young and foolish, could not keep it to himself but blabbed it to all his brothers, thereby increasing their regard for him even more, so much so that they sold him to a slave trader. How to make friends and influence people, eh?

Many of our talented youth will have great dreams and visions, and may also find it hard to keep these things in their hearts and ponder upon them first. Instead, like Joseph, they too may inadvertently provoke jealously and resentment amongst their peers and their seniors. In a world of insecure people who are always looking over their shoulders and worried about their own place in the sun, an uppity youngster who’s obviously full of talent can be extremely threatening.

And sadly, this happens as much in the church as in the marketplace…

But how does God prepare and nurture His chosen vessels to ensure that they are fit for the task? Scarily for us all, He forges their character through the furnace of affliction. It often seems the greater the task ahead, the longer and more grievous the training process.

For Joseph, the arrogant whelp, thirteen years as a slave and a prisoner, until he is thoroughly humbled and wondering if his vision was the real thing, or a figment of his imagination. For Moses, Egyptian prince and self-styled saviour of his people, forty years in the desert looking after a flock of bleating sheep and goats. Both men broken, deflated and unworthy of a second glance by the world – and yet, used by God to fashion some of the greatest feats in history!

Has God changed His training methods for His children today? I doubt it. God is still preparing broken vessels out of which His glory can shine. He is still looking for sons and daughters who are faithful in the small things of life, so that they are more likely to be faithful when the big things come along. He is still looking for those who face unjust affliction and view it not as punishment, but as preparation.

Will we finally see a generation of Christians who truly believe that our Father in heaven is really a good God, and who are willing to give thanks in all things, good as well as bad? Having a heart of gratitude in all circumstances must surely be one of the attributes that pleases God most, because it affirms His nature as a God who loves and cares for His children. How His heart must be broken that so many of us bitch and whine and cuss when “things don’t go according to plan”, because it’s equivalent to accusing God of being uncaring and powerless to intervene in their affairs.

A verse in Revelation (21.4) continues to haunt me – “He will wipe away all tears from their eyes. There will be no more death, no more grief or crying or pain. The old things have disappeared." I keep asking myself why it is necessary for God to wipe away our tears when we are already in heaven? Perhaps it’s when He reveals the grand plans He had in store for each one of us, but which we failed to fulfill because we lacked the perseverance, the discipline and the faithfulness to finish the training process. And our tears flow when we realize the lost opportunities to impact a fallen world and have a hand in saving those precious to His heart...

Anonymous said...

Hey Michele,

I resonate with what you say about hard and soft skills. In my experience, the soft skills are very very important. Great post.
Thanks

Anonymous said...

Hey james,

Your "comment" is more like a blog post. maybe you should start a blog yourself? I promise I will read it if you start it!